Family and friends — and whiskey — keep me well stocked with great stories.

July 2017

My Disney Poop Story

By | 2017-07-30T14:12:22+00:00 July 20th, 2017|Life ..., Potty ...|

There are certain moments that seem to define your life. My trip to the bathroom at Disney about 10 years ago was one of those moments. This story is long, but the payoff is worth it. Don't be discouraged just because it's called a "poop story." It was a hot and humid day at the Magic Kingdom. I had just polished off a bread bowl full of clam chowder and the family decided to hit Splash Mountain.

June 2017

November 2016

Bo-tterfly Effect: The Impact of Bo Jackson

By | 2017-07-30T14:00:24+00:00 November 7th, 2016|Fantasy Football, Life ...|

Every now and then, I’ll come across a sports story that I assume everyone around me is familiar with. Then I realize, I’m an old bastard, and the guys around me are mostly in their 20s. So then I have storytime. It’s like when your grandpa tells you about the Heidi Game. I also figured most of my readers might not know these stories either, so here you go. This is the story of how certain decisions could have changed the course of several teams in several sports because of the impact of Bo Jackson and his presence or absence.

Saturday Morning Cartoons

By | 2016-11-08T20:26:14+00:00 November 2nd, 2016|Television|

I'm 40 years old, which means that my formative years (from 6-15 years old) were in the perfect Saturday Morning Cartoons time period of 1977-86. Five years earlier (1971) and there would have been way fewer cartoons available to watch on Saturday (there wasn't even any electric back then!) And five later (1991), after the cable boom, and the Looney Tunes were already starting to be phased out by politically correct censors.

Best Candy Bars Ever Mock Draft

By | 2017-07-30T14:18:58+00:00 November 1st, 2016|Food ...|

A good piece of chocolate can make your day better. Diabetes, obesity, bad skin, spoiled dinners and chocolate smears on your face aside, the best candy bars ever make life awesome! My friends at posted a blog listing the top five candy bars ever. Check it out when you get a chance, and without spoiling anything, I’ll just let you know that I nearly choked on the nine candy bars I was eating at the time, when I saw Mr. Goodbar listed in the top three.

October 2016

Best Chips Ever Mock Draft

By | 2016-11-08T20:20:24+00:00 October 29th, 2016|Food ...|

People that know me know I’m serious about three things: Dogs that look like people, “Three’s Company” fan fiction – and snack chips. There’s nothing worse than going to someone’s house for a party, and finding out their idea of the best chips ever is a half-open bag of store-brand potato chips, with some organic veggie chips that they claim, “Tastes like real food!”

Best World War II Movies of All Time: Mock Draft

By | 2016-11-08T20:19:07+00:00 October 28th, 2016|Movies|

Memorial Day is upon us once again, and we’re all asked to reflect and honor all of the fallen American soldiers that have died in wars. Outside of the Iraq and Afghanistan wars in recent decades, my generation really doesn’t have much exposure to the World Wars, Korea or Vietnam – outside of the movies. But we all know World War II, which made me rank the best World War II Movies of all time.

15 Men’s Restroom Rules

By | 2017-06-14T07:56:46+00:00 October 25th, 2016|Potty ...|

Coming up with men’s restroom rules wasn’t that hard. I’ve worked in an office environment for most of my life, and it's safe to say that I have learned the do’s, don’ts and doo-doos of sharing a bathroom with dozens of men from multiple businesses. I have a lot of experience in the bathroom, I’m sort of a poop prodigy. My Disney Poop Story alone would make you think I'm a magnet for crazy things happening to me in public restrooms. Iv'e had 6-year-old boys eyeball me through the stall door until I was finished, and I've had toilets overflow in the stall next to me.

Best Classic Rock Albums of All Time: Mock Draft

By | 2016-11-08T20:19:48+00:00 October 24th, 2016|Music|

The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inducted Donovan, The Beastie Boys, Red Hot Chili Peppers and Guns N’ Roses (Why is the apostrophe on the “N” like that?), along with several people you haven’t heard of, in 2012. There are very few current bands I would consider “rock bands,” like Foo Fighters, Chili Peppers, Jack White, and maybe Linkin Park, The Strokes and a couple others I’m forgetting? But the days of listening to an entire album (vinyl or not) are long behind us.

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