One of the great things about writing for my own website is that I can write about whatever I feel like. Sometimes it’s about Fantasy Football and Fantasy Baseball, and sometimes it’s about … other things. So I always get a kick out of the different weird keywords that end up sending people to my site through the search engines. Using tools like a google rank checker helps too when it comes to seeing how my site is doing, as we all know how important the use of relevant keywords are for any website’s success. This article is about those weird keywords!
First, there are plenty of keywords that have to do with Fantasy Sports that usually sends people my way. For instance, my preseason article on the Top 30 NFL Fantasy Football Rookies for 2012 continues to send the most people my way, with keyword phrases like, “top nfl rookies 2012” and “best rookie running backs 2012.”
But there are a ton of non-Fantasy Sports related keywords/keyword phrases that take people from Google search results pages to my pages — and here are the most interesting of that group:
Weird Keywords For DavidGonos.com
“milky way candy”
This has to be one of the strangest, considering I have only done one article that discusses the Milky Way candy bar. I wrote a Best Candy Bars Ever Mock Draft post, in which I ranked where I would draft each popular candy bar.
The extra strange part is – I ranked Milky Way ninth! But it’s actually the image that I took from some other site that is getting all the visits. It certainly is tasty looking! Some of the other images are popular, as well, bringing me visitors for “3 musketeers,” “twix,” “snickers,” and “crunch.”
“racist fantasy football team names”
Not sure how to feel about this one. It’s like, “Sweet, got some page views!” And then you realize a bunch of racists are coming to your site. It’s up there with finding out your daughter was voted “Miss Teen Florida,” only to find out that only sexual predators were allowed to vote.
This keyword phrase is sending people to my site because of Yeti Vedder’s article on naming your Fantasy Football team. One of his team name suggestions was “Arian Nation,” and then he even said, “Make sure you spell Arian correctly or you will look even more racist!”
Some of the other reasons people are coming to that article on my site, include these keyword phrases, “somewhere over dwayne bowe,” “jacquizz in my pants,” “wes welker wife” and my all-time favorite keyword ever:
Again, that keyword draws people to that page because Yeti Vedder came up with the Fantasy Football team name, “The Girl With the Butthole Tattoo.” This name is in reference to the story in Fort Lauderdale, where I live, about a woman that chose to get her boyfriend’s name tattooed on, well, her butthole.
I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again – Florida is like the drain for the rest of the country’s weird basin. I think it’s a matter of these people not being comfortable in the states they are in because of their weirdness, or because they are shunned by family and neighbors, but all the weirdos move to Florida.
I can’t imagine the disappointment someone had after typing in that keyword phrase and then happening upon my blog post comparing South Florida to Central Florida. I reference the high amount of fake boobs in each area, and why there are a lot of white trash fake boobs in Hillsborough, Polk, Orange, Brevard and Osceola Counties, maybe they have an abundance of actresses from adult sites like and more.
This is one of my favorite keyword phrases, only because I try to imagine what these people were actually looking for when they typed that in. They are sent to my site because of “My Disney Poop Story,” which I posted earlier this year. I promise it’s a funny read that won’t make you throw up.
It’s true that I’m very sophomoric with my poop humor, and trust me, I have several more poop stories that will eventually get posted. My brother and my nephews have a “handful,” too. I even posted a video of George Brett talking about his own poop story!
Well, I hope you enjoyed this list of weird keyword phrases that send people to my site. I imagine I’ll be posting another one of these six months or so from now, when a whole new set of weird keywords bring people to DavidGonos.com!
David Gonos spent 5 years as a CBSSports.com Senior Fantasy Writer and three more years writing with SI.com. Over the past 17 years, his work has been published on NFL.com, MLB.com, FanDuel, FoxSports.com and USA Today. Since 2001, he has been tracking down the Top 50-plus Free Fantasy Football Draft Tools online. You can contact David Gonos here.